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why do Mr. Nice Guy always finish last?

You can be poor but dont be cheap;
Be a gentleman and not a silly fool;
A winner does what is appropriate;
A loser can only dream of doing it .
Silly nice guys in relationships :
Nice guys who think they're making their partner feel good by saying how much they love to listen to her talk, but never add anything to the conversation themselves. You're not making her feel good. You're boring her to death. Stop staring at her with your chin in your hand when you go out to eat. You give her the creeps. She is NOT an animal in a zoo. And it's not HER job to keep up the entire conversation. Her ego is NOT so fragile that she needs to be worshipped.

Nice guys who lie and think that a decision not to call them on their first lie means we're not going to dump them when they do it again. In other words: stupid guys. 

Nice guys who make friends with us and then think we owe them something more than friendship.

Nice guys who have no hobbies except sitting around wishing they had a girlfriend like all those cool guys on THE REAL WORLD.

Nice guys who, upon getting a girlfriend, feel they "don't really deserve her". This is insulting. If you don't think you are worth something special, then what you are telling her is that SHE picked a loser.

Nice guys who expect that their girlfriend is going to be their Best Friend, then their Lover, when they themselves can't even find a way to have any male best friends. Talk about suffocation! No thanks.

Nice guys who put women on pedestals. By worshipping her, you objectify and demean her.

Nice guys who think they're the ONLY amateurs in the world at love, and that when a woman doesn't want to have anything to do with them, they're hateful, spiteful bitches who are experts at hurting poor, poor widdle innocent nice guys. Yep, we all read books on how to do it. All girls receive secret, expert instruction from their gym teachers, usually in 5th grade in most school districts, about the ins and outs of love, while the poor nice guys are left to fumble around with no clues.

Nice guys who are too STUPID to figure out any other way out of their so-called predicament except to conclude that they have to become woman-battering heavy drinkers and sports players.

Nice guys who want a beautiful, attractive woman, but do little to take care of their own appearance. We're not talking about being a muscle-bound creep, but fer crissakes get some exercise! Take up some kind of activity or hobby that gets you off your flabby butt. Walk or ride your bike to work; go for walks at lunch; use the stairs instead of the elevator.... Do a coupla situps in the morning before your shower. How can you have ANY stamina in lovemaking if you get out of breath climbing a couple of flights of stairs?

Nice guys who sit there passively waiting for life to happen to them, instead of actively pursing their goals and dreams.

Sad but true...  "Nice Guys/Girls Finish Last." At an early age, girls start interacting with boys and when girls get rejected cause they thought they were the sweetest, nicest person in the world to this guy, but it ends up the guy couldn't give a shit. So this is this is the point in time, when that girl becomes a heartless bitch, coming up with bullshit excuses like this to justify using guys and concluding that it's this "nice guy's" fault for being who he is. Girls/women are the same way, even if it's not all the time. They may be bitches to most people, but they will go out of their way to please a small group of other guys, in hopes that they will go for them. It's quite pathetic. Girls think they're bad ass, but they're just nice girls putting up a front. Not really a bad heartless bitch
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Here are a list of traits that turn women off:

  • Mr. Insecurity: Women like men who are self-confident. Most nice guys I've met are terribly shy -- they aren't "nice" they are just afraid to approach a woman.  Why do "jerks" get all the women? Because jerks aren't afraid to talk to them!  Shyness and self-consciousness are not "manly" traits. Women want a guy who likes himself and doesn't need someone else to reassure him that he's worthy and good. If you don't even like yourself, why should someone else? Don't look for happiness outside yourself. Once you are happy with yourself, people will see that in you and be attracted to it, just like bugs are attracted to light.
  • Mr. Clingy: Guys who want to spend all their time with a woman, or who attach themselves to a woman shortly after meeting her are a total turn off. Women feel threatened and wonder if he's a stalker. And we really don't want someone who thinks they are in love after one date. That just reeks of desperation.
  • Mr. Depression: Hey, everyone gets depressed once in awhile. But having known some of these nice guys, one thing I noticed is that they are often depressed and some even threaten suicide. Sorry guys, most women still believe we need a good provider – and how can you support us (not just financially, but emotionally, too) if you can't even hold yourself up?

  • Mr. Victim:  Many of these self-proclaimed nice guys love to play the victim card.  In every past relationship, the woman walked all over them and they were total victims.  Great, he's a prime target for a woman who wants a guy she can walk all-over, and women who want a guy to take care of them will not be interested in Mr. Victim.  Some Mr. Victims will introduce themselves as Mr. Cheated-On.  He thinks that claiming he was cheated on is a "get out of jail free" card -- he's assuming this story will not only earn him sympathy but will also make him look totally blameless in the break-up.  Men realize that saying "I was cheated on" sounds better than saying, "I was a jackass who treated her badly so she left me."  If he's actually telling the truth, it makes you wonder why he can't keep a woman.  Keep in mind that the main reason women cheat is because they are feeling unloved,  neglected, or unappreciated -- not just for the sex. Also keep in mind that if it's true, do you really want a guy who is going to worry about you cheating on him, too?  Who needs that kind of paranoia in a relationship?
  • Mr. Materialistic:  This guy is obsessed with money and nice things.  If he has money, he'll try to impress women with how much money he makes, or how prestigious his job sounds.  But later, he'll whine that women are "gold diggers" only after him for his money.  If you don't want to attract "gold diggers" stop bragging.  Simple enough. Guys who don't have money complain women won't date them.  One guy recently whined, "Women judge us on our bank accounts first, and our personalities second!"  If that was true, only rich men would marry!  Even if it is true that men are judged by their wallets, women are judged by their looks. It's a pretty even playing field so stop whining!   If you don't have enough money to get a beautiful woman, date the average woman who can't get the rich guy. Problem solved.
  • Mr. Romantic: Many nice guys fancy themselves as romantic, sweet and poetic. You've met this guy – he's the kind who'll buy romantic gifts for a gal he just met, and are always trying to make every encounter "romantic". Contrary to popular belief, not all women are slobbering romantics. A woman who is not really into poetry and candle light dinners or walks on the beach will be suspicious of a guy who claims he is. She'll think he's either trying to con her, or that he's just plain sappy. Either way, she'll scratch him off her list as being incompatible.
  • Mr. Mom: Guys who love domestic chores such as cooking and cleaning, who love shopping, and who are really maternal with kids are all giving off a feminine vibe. A lot of women will think he's too feminine. Some gals hate to cook and clean, so they'll jump at the kind of man who wants to take over those activities. But many women will feel usurped by that behavior, even if they dislike those things. Just as many men feel threatened by a woman who earns more than them, many women will feel misplaced by a man who thinks he can do better at being homemaker and mommy. And let's face it -- while some women might find guys who totally blubber over kids to be cute at first, it gets old quickly. Keep in mind, a lot of women are looking for macho guys.

  • Mr. Immature: Most women don't want a guy they see as immature and irresponsible. They'll see a man who is financially irresponsible as a kid who can't handle a checkbook. If he is addicted to video games, many women will see this as a sign he's not any more grown-up than a teenaged boy. But worse yet, an immature attitude can really chase women off. I've often found these nice guys are often unable to take responsibility for their own actions, and instead blame other people any time things don't go right. The most blatant example of this is how most of these guys blame "assholes" for getting all the women (an Army major I met blames black men for his lack of female companionship). All of these things are blatant signs to women that men are immature and not ready for the responsibilities of a wife and children.









  • Mr. Misogyny: For those of you unfamiliar with the term, this means hatred of women. While this isn't exactly a "feminine" trait, it is another vibe that will turn women off. A lot of nice guys I came across were very bitter and angry towards women in their past, or to all women for liking "jerks". They may not hate all women, but they do hate some women whom they were close to, and this is like a bright, flashing warning sign to most women. Let's just say these guys aren't usually Momma's Boys -- they usually have mommy issues. One of the worst nice guys I met would go off on tirades about how much hatred he had for his birth mother for giving him up for adoption, how much he hated his adoptive mother for supposedly being abusive, his step-mother for not being affectionate with him, and his ex-wife for leaving him for another man. He would talk about how he'd play video games where he could rape and murder women to "vent" his frustrations on these "evil" women in his life. Yea, and then wondered why he couldn't get a date.

My best advice is to always be suspicious of someone who self-proclaims himself anything. When was the last time you saw a guy say, "Hi, I'm Rick, and I'm a total jackass"? Yea, that doesn’t happen. So why would you trust some guy who comes to you and says, "Hi, I'm Rick, I'm one of the nice guys"?

There is a perfectly good reason why self-proclaimed nice guys finish last. No amount of whining will change that.

Extracted from:

Over the years I have seen so many of these truly "nice guys" get involved with women who took advantage of them, became controlling, took them for granted, and after getting everything they could from them... kicked them to the curb. Go figure. These women stated they wanted a "nice guy" and then they treated him like a bag of trash. Or, maybe even a worse case scenario is the woman that DOESN'T kick her nice guy to the curb but rather continues to take advantage of him, treat him like a doormat, and abuse him for years. These poor guys are left with virtually no self-esteem, wimpering, powerless, unhappy... and with no idea how they got themselves into this situation in the first place! Thus, the "Nice guys finish last" phrase comes into the picture. Well, yes in this case I guess that's true.

What's the problem here? Uhhh... well, looks like the "nice" guy chose the "not-so-nice" gal. Be careful nice guys, it seems to me you so too often end up with the not-so-nice gals. Yes, Henry was right in this regard too... you need to take the lead. Be straightforward and honest about what you want and yes, a little aggression (in the positive sense) is good and very refreshing to us single ladies who are tired of always taking the lead. I don't mean be controlling, I mean by making informed decisions on what you want in a mate and having the guts to not worry about what anyone else thinks and take some initiative and be the nice guy you are without allowing yourself to get trampled on. Don't worry about whether or not your "nice guy" image isn't macho to your other guy friends. They're not going home with you at the end of the day, are they?

Isn't choosing the right partner the most important decision you make in your life? So why do so many people choose a mate so quickly without really knowing?

How do you really know for sure if you've found the right one? Well, this is just my own personal opinion but I believe that when it's truly right you know it in the deepest depths of your soul. There are no insecurities or doubts, no jealousies, no games being played, etc... just a true, honest, selfless love that you can't even begin to understand unless you experience it. And the true test of whether it's right or not... You have to truly FEEL the love coming from the other person, knowing that they love you just as truely and deeply as you love them. Is it a rare thing? You bet it is. I don't know about you but after having made so many mistakes in relationships over the years I was willing to wait for it, even if it never happened and I had to grow old alone. You know that old saying "it always happens when you least expect it"? Well, I think that's true. Don't be blind to your possibilities but at the same time don't look too hard or make impulsive decisions. Learn to be happy with yourself and you just might find it when and where you least expect it.

I am happy to say that I finally found my "nice guy" and I plan on treating him like a king for the rest of his life. He deserves it. This girl knows a good thing when she sees it since I've had plenty of experience on the other side over the years.

So, if you're truly a nice guy, don't despair. Just be smarter next time and be SURE you find a "nice girl".

Nice Guys Finish Aged Sign


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